You have just ended an important chapter in your life: your marriage. But how do you tell your child that daddy is not living with you anymore?
He is at the age when he doesn't understand too well what is going on around him. For him the most important persons are mum and dad. That is why when the parents break up the cruel reality affects his entire universe.
When parents get to the conclusion they can't live together anymore, they consider that it's best for the youngest member of the family not know the truth. But the child feels that something wrong is happening around him. The price of the parents' actions is a real shock and the little one needs time to understand this thing that has just happened.
Many children consider they are to blame for the sepa
ration of his parents. They think that their little stupid things they do every day are to the cause of the decision to divorce. Parents have to explain the child what has happened without blaming one or another and to try to assure him the emotional support he needs.
Even if you consider some of his questions to be a little bit too daring you have to answer him straight and to make him draw the right conclusions.
Give him some trust and allow him to take part in your decisions. Even if you are the only one who decides whether you want the divorce or not, make your child think he has also taken part in this process. Thus he will trust more his real forces and he will feel important in your life.
Allow your child to spend time in the company of his father, even if you are separated. He will see that his daddy hasn't left him and he still loves him. If you deny your husband the right to visit him or to take him with him at weekends, you will make your child your enemy as he will see you as the “bad” one who doesn’t allow him to spend time with his father, especially if you the one who decided to divorce.
Tell him the real reasons of the divorce so that he sees you are not the only one to blame. Both parents have to explain the child what had happened using the language specific for his power of understanding and his age.
Breaking Up with Daddy Is Not the End of the World written by Herminne Tonita for FamousWhy.com
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by Herminne Tonita -